Flawed and It's OK

This week's challenge is to start writing with "I have a flaw and it is..".  I can't do that.  Not because I can't think of any and not because I am too proud to share them, though pride is one of my biggest flaws.  I can't start out with that sentence because I have so many flaws; saying "a flaw" would not even begin to scratch the surface.

Some consider flaws to be a physiological thing.  Some consider flaws are only flaws if you can see them.  In my mind a flaw is anything not perfect, though I haven't checked to see what Mr. Webster says about it.

That said, I first must consider my greatest flaw: That I sin. I don't always do the right thing, can be jealous, manipulative and sometimes just not nice.  Again, that is just a scratch in the surface. That generalized flaw is something I share with every human, so it didn't seem all that original to write about. And God has that covered, anyway.

Instead, I will share a physical flaw.  It is something I can't help and because I look perfectly normal (some may dispute that) only those who spend time talking to me would ever know. I can pretty much conceal this flaw, which is what you want to do with flaws anyway, right?

I am partially deaf.  One ear has great hearing..off the charts.  The other ear, well, you know how the adults on Charlie Brown specials sound?  That's what I hear, quietly, with my flawed ear.  If I am looking at your mouth and there isn't too much noise surrounding us, I will most likely 'hear' you.

My parents found out when I was in kindergarten.  I still have the report card on which the teacher wrote how I seemed to be in a world of my own. In school, teachers spend much of their teaching time with their backs to us.  For me, especially in math class, the amount of board time was equal to my understanding.  Sometimes, if I had trouble in a class a teacher would put me at the front row of the classroom.  Yikes!  What kid who wants to blend in wants that? It really didn't help anyway.

I was in speech therapy for a few years because couldn't say my 'r's.  The phrase I had to say over and over was "The dog barks in the park."  My version was "The dog bocks in the pock."

Over time, I learned to adapt and a good part of the time I can just smile and nod and no one is the wiser.  Thousands of times in our marriage I have leaned into my husband to ask "What'd they say?" When we watch a movie, I am thankful for the closed captioning feature.

As with pretty much every flaw, there is a flip side.  If I want a good night's sleep and the neighbors are having a party, I just put my good ear down to the pillow.

The best flip side to this flaw can be best described by two little and very powerful words found often in the Bible: But God.  If you are a believer in God, Jesus and his sacrifice, you will understand this. It would seem ironic that the gift and ministry God placed me in is music; vocal music to be exact.  For vocal music, you have to have a good ear.

My God overcomes my flaw.  He has given me the ability to harmonize, of all things! Why? I believe to bring glory to himself, because, obviously, left up to me and my flaw, the sound produced would not harmonize with anything. It is his doing. What I see as a handicap, God sees as a way to show those I am in contact with that he is greater than hearing loss.  Because of God, what most (myself included) see as a flaw, he turns into a talent.

So, I guess if he can handle that big hurdle of a flaw, he can handle pretty much anything in my life.  It's all good.  God is good. Oh, my kids' names are Sara and Rachel.. I can say my 'r's now.