Confessions of a Smart Cell Phone GPS Virgin

In these days, most everything we own contains a computer and at some point, needs to be told what to do. Hand me a remote, even to the most finely tuned equipment and I will probably show you it can do something you never intended it to do. That isn't always a good thing.

I work from home. On a computer. While I don't question my intelligence, I do know, without a doubt, that I am not technology savvy. Between my husband and my boss, I don't have to do much more than point and click. I know some of you can identify with what I am writing and others can't imagine my plight. Before you feel the need to express pity to my husband and my boss I need to point out that I learn pretty quickly so it is not really a hopeless situation. In fact, I can even fix some html! Recently, my experience with a new tech device left me frustrated and laughing.

Last week, I upgraded my cell phone to a smart phone. I am really excited about it because I have a QWERTY keyboard so it will no longer take me 5 minutes to send a 5 word text. I am learning more about it every day and even plan to download a couple games (once I figure out how). With the phone came a 30 day free GPS feature. Since my husband was driving, I entered our address (really cool, just turn the phone sideways and enter the info!) and listened as it accurately told us the way home. This is so very cool to someone who looks at MapQuest and then writes the information down on an index card whenever directions are needed.

A few days ago, I had an appointment with a doctor whose office was in an area not familiar to me. I remembered my new trusty GPS and entered the address. It was great for a while. The route it set for me was different than what I would have driven, but I figured, what the heck, it knows what it's doing and forged on past the street I knew would take me to that part of town. I made the turn onto the street the computerized voice directed and then, the soothing voice was gone. At at stop sign I looked at the screen to find that no reception was available and I should move to a more open area. OK, I'm game. I drove back to the street I knew would take me near the doctor's office and heard that voice again. "New route" it told me. I had left its advised route and ever flexible, the GPS had another way to get me where I needed to go. The next few turns went pretty smoothly, but something was missing. I think the GPS should applaud me when I make the right turns.

The office was close; I knew it. Just one more turn and I'd be on the right street; only needing to find the correct building. I turned right onto the street just like my new computerized friend directed and saw a group of medical looking buildings up ahead. Finally, I was almost there. My GPS was not done with me yet. That soothing, confident, computerized voice became arrogant and demanding. "Make the next legal U-turn!" it demanded. I can see the buildings up ahead, but, this is a computer, after all, so I made a U-turn. A residential area now loomed ahead, but I continued driving, waiting for direction. The voice said "Make the next legal U-turn." What??? As one having a somewhat compliant personality, I made another U-turn. I listened as the voice, cold and impersonal, gave another instruction. "Make the next legal U-turn." OK, by now I'm looking around for whoever is messing with my mind. I felt like I was in one of those old arcade games where each time you hit the target it changes direction. By then it was time for my appointment and I don't like being late. It was time to take things into my own hands. I turned off the GPS function and called the doctor's office. They gave me the info I needed and minus my new GPS I ended up at the right place, a few minutes late but, hey, I was there.

I have been laughing about it ever since. I have no clue what I did wrong, if anything, but to be bested by a computer tests your wit. I really do like the GPS function and look forward to using it again. It's called a smart phone. I guess it has a sense of humor, too.